God approached Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden and said unto them, “There remain of my gifts to mankind only two items, but I have yet to decide how they shall be divided between man and woman.”
And Adam said, “Tell me of these wondrous things, for I am the man, and by virtue of my closer resemblance to Thee, I must be given the first choice.”
“Well,” said God, “the first item is an extraordinary arrangement of tubing and erectile tissue that will allow you to urinate while standing up.”
“That’s it!” said Adam. “I’ll take it.”
“But this other item . . . ”
“No, no,” said Adam, “that’s what I want, God, and I want it right now.”
The moment the item was installed on his person, Adam gave a gleeful shout, then rushed off to urinate on trees and write his name in the sand, feats that to this day have eluded every woman on earth.
God and Eve stood alone in silence, looking one another in the eye.
“Ok,” Eve said at last, “what’s left for me?”
And God said, “It’s called a brain.”